I love all things oatmeal and oatmeal-like. Growing up, my mom would make me Malt-o-meal with a little salted butter left on top to melt its way to the sides of the bowl and that's where I would start. From outside to in -- only because diving right in would just burn my tongue. I had my method and it was a good one.

If we are at a restaurant and grits is on the menu whether it's cheesy, or served with shrimp, or a fancy poached egg, you best believe that I am going to be the one that will order it. The entire rest of the menu is dead to me. I want that hot corn cereal in my mouth, please and thank you.

When I used to work in retail, lunch was instant oatmeal because it was easy. I remembered a district manager came in for a meeting, and during my lunch, she spotted me with my cup of plain oatmeal. "Anorexic" she called me. Mmmk.

My husband and I love our oatmeal breakfasts on the weekend. That's when I add the fancy shit, like coconut flakes, hemp seeds, chia seeds, chopped mushrooms, peppers, half of an avocado, Maldon salt, hot sauce important from Japan ---- we just go wild with it.

But. yeah there's a but. unfortunately. but not too unfortunate. I need to stop saying but.

I haven't mentioned it before, but I am currently on a hormone detox as recommended by my naturopathic doctor, and it's basically like an elimination diet but mainly with antioxidant foods that contain a high ORAC (Oxygen Radical Absorbance Capacity) value. That way, my liver can take in all the good stuff easy without having to worry about toxins or foods that make my liver work over-time. I am currently at the end of week 2 (the detox period is 21 days) and by far, my most favorite things on the program's meal plan is No-atmeal. Go figure. But hey now, it's really good.

Let me know what you think!

[taken with permission, from the meal plan of Dr. Jolene Brighten's Hormone Revolution Detox program]

Yield: 2 servings


  • 1/2 cup walnuts
  • 1/2 cup pecans
  • 1/4 cup flax seeds
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
  • 1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 2 tablespoon almond butter
  • 2 medium bananas or one large banana is fine too
  • 1 cup almond milk or coconut milk
  • toppings of your choice


  1. using a small food processor (I used a nutri-bullet), combine walnuts, pecans and flax seeds and blend until course. Don't let it go too long because then it'll turn into the consistency of nut butter. A few large pieces left are okay -- it gives the no-atmeal a crunchy texture which I really like.
  2. in a sauce pan, mash bananas and almond butter together until combined.
  3. add almond milk and spices then stir until the batter is creamy.
  4. place sauce pan on stove over low heat.
  5. add the nut mixture, giving it a stir frequently to prevent burning on bottom and sides of pans.
  6. once the no-atmeal starts bubbling, keep stirring until it becomes thick (or however the consistency you'd like). If it becomes too thick, add more almond/coconut milk.
  7. scoop about 1/3 cup into a bowl and top with fruit, nut/seed butters, honey, etc.
  8. split the no-atmeal into two bowls and top with your choice of fruits, nut butter, honey, seeds, etc.


Purify The Colors